Saturday, January 2, 1999

A Far Cry From Perfect

Well, Christmas is over and the New Year is upon us. Where did the tie go? It seems like the older we get, the faster time slips through our fingers. We are powerless to stop it. All we can do is make the best of things. New Year’s is a time of rebirth, a time of hope, and a time of fulfillment. Resolutions are all around us … just waiting to start their magic.

This year, I want to be a better parent than I was last year. I try really hard, but I’m a far cry from perfect. I help with daily homework, constantly read new stories, and help cram for those big tests. I give suggestions on improvements and advice on resources. I lend a hand whenever needed and an ear when problems arise. I am a weekly school volunteer, I am active in the PTOs, and I offer help wherever needed. I have a tendency to not be able to say no. But sometimes my patience runs thin. Sometimes the arguments between my youngest two can break a camel's back. Sometimes I yell, sometimes I scream, sometimes I cry in vain. Sometimes the back talk, from all three, will test the best of saints.

So, instead of trying to be a better parent, I will try for a happy medium. I will continue o help while controlling my temper. Maybe, mommy needs a “timeout,” sometimes, instead of the girls. Maybe, mommy needs to go to bed early, or be grounded from her favorite things.

This year, I want to be a better Christian. I try really hard, but I’m a far cry from perfect. I read my bible, I pray each day, and I attend church, but no on a regular basis. I have drifted from my religion, and I can’t explain why. My girls attend church every Wednesday, and they are active in mission works, but where am I? I drop them off every week, then I hurry hoe to catch the news. After all, you don’t get much “alone” time when you have three children. To be a better Christian, I must start from inside. I must examine my reasons for straying, and then try to pull everything together. I must remember that I am a role model for my children. Monkey see, monkey do.

This year, I will be a better wife. I try really hard, but I’m a far cry from perfect. I give my spouse unconditional love and support, and I receive that in return. Sometimes we just sit and talk, even if there is housework to do. Sometimes we will watch television together, even if there are clothes to be washed. And we always have “date night” at least once a month. But, sometimes we both get angry, sometimes we snap and yell, sometimes we just don’t listen, and sometimes we don’t seem to care. I have many weaknesses that I must try to control, because, before I can become a better wife, I have to become a better person.